Real Life & the Movies: Part II

Just seeing this movie poster traumatizes me

The best boyfriend ever treated me to dinner and a movie last night downtown.  It had been a longggggggggggggg week and we were both exhausted but happy to be getting out and about.  Yay Friday night!  Dinner at The Village Grill was delicious.  We got to sit outside on their deck and enjoy some chicken panini yumminess and chat.  The Yankees game was being broadcast on a giant HDTV, not that either of us really cared about the Yankees game but hey...  We topped it off by sharing some apple pie and vanilla ice cream.  "Autumn!" he said.  Yep, it was a good start to the evening.

Then we wandered over to The Grandin to wait for the previous showing of The Master to let out so we could get seated for the 9:35 showing.  The critics have been raving about this movie and it was opening night.  High expectations!

First of all, it's never a good sign when it's opening night and no one is there to see the movie.  Secondly, when people stagger out proclaiming "Worst movie ever!" you should be concerned.  An acquaintance made his way out of the theatre and into the lobby.  "So, how was it?!" I asked in a happy, expectant voice.  You could tell that he was trying to think of a way not to depress me.  He summed it up by saying, "It's different and disturbing and has no plot."  Keep in mind, this man directs theatre for a living.  Two and a half hours later I would sum up the movie as:

• In my top three worst movies ever along with Ponette and North Fork
• Disturbing and stupid ass
• A total waste of money ~ sorry best boyfriend ever :-(
• A joke on the public ~ the producers should be forced to refund everyone's money especially since no one should have to pay for garbage like this during a recession
• I told my boyfriend: "I feel like I just spent some time in pergatory now so I'll have less time to spend in it after I die"

Various professional film critics raved about this movie.  Why?  It's awful.  There was not one person in that theatre for either show that liked it to my knowledge.  In our time slot, people were falling asleep because they just couldn't take the awful, boring, weird-ass-ness of this movie.

So, my opinion is: save yourself and don't watch this movie and don't believe a word the critics are writing about it.  Real life and this movie have nothing in common.  Unless you want to compare it to torture.